When Were You Wrecked? Thoughts about Being "Wrecked" - Beginnings, Bosnia... And the Book "Wrecked: When A Broken World Slams Into Your Comfortable Life" By Jeff Goins

Recently I read the book, Wrecked: When A Broken World Slams Into Your Comfortable Life by Jeff Goins. In his book, Jeff shares his journey to being "wrecked" and the life that has led him to. So he calls others to live to seek and identify being wrecked and to live out a changed life. According to Jeff and the people Jeff knows, being wrecked can be described as "Ruined. Devastated. Undone. Their lives were forever changed, and there was no returning to how life used to be. Their paradigms had shifted. Their worldview was infected with a contagion that was spreading to every facet of their life. More than one person told me, 'I can’t go back to who I was.'"

So I ask myself this question, "When was I wrecked?" Well, I guess the better question for me is when was I first "wrecked?" I realize that the byline to my blog is "thoughts from a broken heart for the broken," and my use of the term "broken"  can relate a bit to this "wreckage." So I think back, before moving to South Africa, before YWAM and missions trips, before staffing my church's youth ministry... Was I wrecked during my first missions trip while in college? I was 2001, and I was age 21. Experiencing the war-torn nation of Bosnia 5 years after their war, hearing TRUE LIFE stories from my new friends, seeing the death marks of bombs and landmines on landscapes, on the skeletal remains of former homes, and on the bodies of ALIVE people whose arms and legs were buried in unmarked graves just as many of the fallen - lost loves ones rested - soldiers, defenders, oppressors, freedom fighters, aggressors, grandmothers, lovers, fathers, mothers, brothers, sisters... so many - gone.

I wrote about my experience there right after my trip and one story in particular. As I sat at the war memorial on the hill overlooking his town, my friend related his story. He was just a 13 year old boy - trying to stay alive, to survive, to provide for his family. Snipers had aimed and shot from the hill where I sat  - at the town, at the people, and there they hit, wounded, hurt, maimed, killed, and destroyed Life.

"We cannot become who we are without going through pain. And who can do such a thing without trusting the struggle is worth it? Or that the results will be good? We must endeavor to be wrecked with a deep, reckless faith that confounds the world and maybe even puzzles us at times. It will be worth it." - I agree, Jeff. My wreckage seems a bit synonymous with pain and with death, literally and maybe with death of myself and my rose-colored beliefs. Jeff writes, "true compassion causes your heart to break - even at the moment you're helping. It breaks for all the needs you're not meeting, for everything else you could be doing." He goes on to define compassion as "suffering with."

I attended a silence and solitude retreat a few years back, and what I remember from my time with God, being silent...waiting...and listening...is that God gave me a name, "Mother of Suffering." Sounds a bit bleak, I know, but I feel - deeply.

I haven't had many people in my family die or even close friends - but many people I've known have experienced traumatizing pain and deaths of loves ones. My parents didn't shy away from taking me to funerals as a small child. Some may think I was too young and should have been protected. 

Looking back, I see that physical death is a part of life - timely with old age and even untimely - under unforeseen circumstances. But I understand Death and Pain still Is.

But I also understand that THESE are not the End of Life.

My parents took their first missions trips in the 1980's - maybe that is when they were wrecked. I heard the stories of lives lived in different circumstances than my own and the world I knew. Did I understand at such a young age? Was I wrecked then?

Was I wrecked when a childhood friend of mine didn't show up to elementary school one day, and I never saw her again? I heard that her family moved - suddenly. I've always wondered, what did her life include of pain, of suffering...?

Was I wrecked when I read The Hiding Place by Corrie ten Boom at age 9? ...as I was moved by many books and their characters thereafter?

Was I wrecked when I learned about wars, the U.S.S.R., the Berlin Wall, and China in my elementary school social studies classes?

Was I wrecked when I understood God's unconditional love and the death of His Son Jesus to save me? I was 10 years old. I was brought to tears I could not control. My heart hurt. Jesus Suffered. I felt his suffering. And I understood the hope of redemption.

Today I find myself in South Africa.

In the future maybe I will be somewhere else.

But each day I look for a piece - of hope.

So much of the time lots and lots of pain and death loom.

But there are still days that I SEE -

I not only grasp - but I KNOW Hope.

I am not saying that being wrecked brings you overseas - nor does Jeff say this. Living out change from this wrecked place does not look like a specific vocation or living in a certain place. Jeff explains, "If you are going to find work worth doing - a vocation to fulfill and challenge you - you will have to encounter a reality bigger than yourself. It may not be what others say it should be or what you think, but it will come if you are looking for it. Our callings come to us as surprises, like a distant dream we could've sworn was real. When you find it, whatever your 'it' is, it will be unavoidable - something that wrecks you and compels you to act. At times, the work you're called to do will be hard and confusing, but if you press in, you will see the purpose behind the pain. You will see how the whole experience is causing you to grow. And you will thanks God for the whole journey."

Jeff calls his readers to this mini-manifesto:

"Instead of wanting more, we will strive for less.

Instead of easier, faster, better; we will opt for slow and deliberate. We will take our time.

We will seek first the needs of others and trust that our own will be provided.

We will discipline ourselves to believe.

We will find our lives by losing it.

We will seek the pearl of great price and sacrifice everything for it.

We will become less to gain more."

Just to let you know, I am not "there" yet. I don't have life figured out, but I am on the journey of discovery - to Live and Be here and now because His Purpose is bigger than me.  

I invite you to read Jeff's book. It's good. You can get it here: http://www.amazon.com/Wrecked-Broken-World-Slams-Comfortable/dp/0802404928. Or you can read Jeff Goin's blog here: http://goinswriter.com/

And so as I asked myself, I ask you, "When were you wrecked?" Or do you still need to be? What does your journey look like?

(Quotation excerpts from Goins, Jeff. Wrecked: When A Broken World Slams Into Your Comfortable Life. Chicago: Moody Publishers, 2012.)

When My Student Inspires Me

At the end of class, students and staff stood in a circle. Our facilitator asked if any students had any motivation to share with the class before departure.

She shared her story - of tragedy. 

Tragedy upon tragedy.

But her countenance was at peace.

She shared because she was compelled by A Greater Peace.

She understands her classmates' hardships: township life, lack of money, death and destruction. 

And she knows a Deeper Foundation and an Inner Joy - He who gives Life to Dry Bones.

And she calls her classmates to discover and find He who gives True Hope and True Life.

Tears ran down cheeks that day as hearts of my students were stirred.

My own tears flowed as my own heart hurt... 

And I am so grateful to a girl who I hoped to inspire but instead she inspires me to Hope.

                                                                                                                                                                  

Please pray for my students' hearts - to Seek and to Find Hope and Life in Him.

Our Students Graduate - Celebrate Your Milestones AND Your Footstones

28 students completed their Life Skills and Computer Training course! This means that ALL the students who began the course finished and graduated. 

So I've heard this is quite the feat they accomplished - because many times a person will begin something only to drop out.

But finishing is reason to celebrate! 

Photo Credit: HAC Staff

So we held a graduation program surrounded by their families and friends, with congratulations from our directors and instructors, and two students gave speeches. We sang and danced and prayed (I was definitely out of my comfort zone as I felt like the clunky robot in the midst of beautiful African worship), and food and fellowship followed the ceremony.

The students were so excited, and you could not rub the perma-smiles from their faces. Why? They had graduated from high school within the last few years, BUT they did not have a graduation ceremony. Only the students with special honors were recognized for their accomplishments.

This is so sad to me.

I believe we need to recognize and celebrate our accomplishments. We talk a lot about people's "milestones," those big accomplishments in our lives, the monumental feats, and celebrating these. We recognize those with the best grades, the loudest careers, and rolling in the dough.

But who defines the milestone?

Why should we celebrate completion? Why should we recognize what may seem small in our own lives or that is perceived as small by someone else?

What if finishing something - like 7 weeks of Life Skills and Computer Training - is the domino for someone's better tomorrow?

Maybe someday my "footstone" will become my milestone.

Maybe someday this graduation day - this "footstone" - will become my students' milestone.

Photo Credit: HAC Staff

                                                                                                                                                         

Will you pray for encouragement and perseverance for these graduates as they apply for jobs in a country with 40+% unemployment?

Do you recognize a "footstone" - something to celebrate - in your life today?

Life Skills - More than For Work & For Life But also For the Heart

My first two weeks of the Life Skills Course in the South African township of Philippi is complete, and now I have a chance to reflect and rest (kindof) before classes start up again! We have 28 young adult students learning in an experiential and reflective environment. During the first week they learned everything from trust, acceptance, self-esteem, forgiveness, how our qualities and values affect how we problem solve, how to work together in a business, managing people and activities, and time management. They are eager learners ready to change their lives! I am so excited and blessed to be part of their journey. 

Students participating in a class exercise
All Photos Here Credit: HAC Staff

 Where? Hope Africa's concentration is in the township of Philippi, about a 20-30 minute drive away from where I live (near Cape Town). This is an area with many townships, numbering from hundreds of thousands to possibly a million or more people. It's hard to find a specific number.

Who? Philippi's majority are from the Xhosa tribe, and so are most of our students - some of whom have moved in from across the country in the Eastern Cape (I am located in the Western Cape) and live with relatives or a parent(s) in order "to find better life," as many of my students have expressed with hopefulness. 

A student's story may consist of a broken family, a tin home with a leaky roof, teenage pregnancy, finding it hard to concentrate, even in elementary through high school, because of hunger - and lack of finances even to buy food - just many difficult circumstances... But others' stories may include loving dads, close relationships with their mothers, although many families live in small homes - laughter and love, hope beyond their circumstances, joy and peace found in God... 

These 28 students have taken a step towards HOPE. They have names difficult to pronounce for my foreign tongue, like "Vukuzenzele" (Vue - kue - zenn - zae - lae) - actually that's not a name that I know of, but each name sounds similar to that and like it has a hundred syllables. Some names include clicking sounds - something I am not experienced with. Hopefully, I'll be learning some Xhosa language soon!

When? Monday through Friday my team and I car pool to our classroom in Philippi. The computer training and Bible overview sessions begin soon.

Why? Classes go Deep. Interactive. Reflective. Because the deep stuff like our trust issues or our relationships and communication at home affect who we are and how we interact whether in our personal life or in our workplace environment.

How? To identify trust issues and learn to trust, we worked in groups. For example, a person had to lie on the ground as the group worked together to lift the person above their heads and return them safely to the ground again. Yes, I was the largest person in my group of small-sized girls - I practically held my breath the whole time, and my gymnastics training came in handy. And no, not for the dismount from above their heads (just kidding) but for holding my body tight and straight as a board!

Step 1: Get a good grip. Step 2: Lift.

Step 3: Don't drop! (and don't look down!)

My group and I lifting, lifting, lifting (and hopefully not dropping)!

On Monday the topic was communication. They were asked to reflect and discuss, "what is communication?," "hindrances to effective communication," and "how do we effectively communicate?" for each person and within a team (such as a business). This then led the class to look at communication at home/within their families and to identify and discuss how to work on/maintain communication in relationships. It was an emotional day as students addressed difficult relationships, such as with their fathers, and how the process of forgiveness is healthy for their hearts personally, even if the relationship cannot be resolved.

How can I pray? Yes please - please pray!

• For my students  - to share the deeper stuff and to take in all they can learn.
• For my team - to learn all we can and for God to give us wisdom in how to guide our students.
• For a family on my team - their little 16 month old boy has been having severe health issues (including emergency trips), especially in his lungs.
• For a great roommate and apartment to come available SOON!

Thank you so much for your lives, love, prayers, and support. I love the little messages I've received from you - I carry you in my heart (that little ocean really does make you seem so far away). 

                                                             Blessings. Shannon